Symbols of Hope: Remembering Loved Ones at Christmas time

"Here, I made you something," my husband handed me an object one night before dinner.

It was a few weeks after my miscarriage.

"Do you know what it is?" He asked eagerly.

I smiled, confused but pleased by his gift. My husband is not typically crafty person. Nor a gift-giving person.

"Uh...key chain?"

"Well, yes." He rolled his eyes. "But look at this pattern. Do you recognize it?"
 
I shook my head.

I watched, bemused, as my husband dashed through the house and found a plastic pirate doll.

"Look!" he pointed. "It's Izzy! See the pattern on her bandana?"

Source

 And then I did see and...Oh. 

 I made the connection and my eyes filled with tears.

You see, our 7 year old son named the baby we lost, Izzy, after the pirate from one of his favorite Disney shows. Before the miscarriage, I rolled my eyes at the name, chuckling and shaking my head, thinking, "I would never name my baby Izzy."

But that was the only name the baby got.

I clutched the keychain in one hand and gripped my husband's hands with the other...callused hand with strong, square fingers, hands that held me when I wept for the loss of our child, hands that wove a pink and white key chain.

"I made this for you so that you can always have Izzy with you."

My husband, like many men, didn't have many words when we went through this time of grief. He felt and grieved in his own way, a way that was different from my way.

But he made a key chain for me, in memory of our child.

It was a symbol of loss, of acknowledgment, of remembering.

Christmas is usually a time of hope and happiness for most families. But it can also be a time of grief as we remember loved ones who are no longer with us.

We bought an ornament for our tree this year--a plastic pirate doll: Izzy.

I was hesitant at first.

"It's really expensive." I told my husband as my mouse hovered over the BUY icon.

"It's doesn't matter." He told me. "Get it."

So I did. And Izzy came in the mail in a little white box and we hung her on our tree.

It's been almost a year since I found out I was pregnant: it was December 14. And instead of cradling a 4 month old baby (boy? girl?), I am hanging an ornament on our tree.

It is sobering....but, by the grace of God, not sad.

And I do not use that phrase lightly. His grace has carried me, buffered me, pushed me, grown me...in agonizing ways in the past year. 

This has been one of the hardest years of my life, but it has been one of soul-wrenching growth as well, growth that has been fostered by faith and has led to hope.

"And not only this, but we also exult in our tribulations, knowing that tribulation brings about perseverance;  and perseverance, proven character; and proven character, hope;  and hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out within our heart" (Romans 5:3-5).

I've carried my key chain this year, just as I've carried Izzy in my heart.
We put an ornament on our tree, not as a symbol of loss, but as a symbol of Hope.

Because His hope has not disappointed us.  His love will continue to carry us through every season.

How do you remember your departed loved ones at Christmas?
How do you seek hope, even in time of intense grief?

You can read more about our miscarriage journey here: 

Sweet Iz: Our Miscarriage Announcement
Miscarriage and Faith: Suffering and God's Goodness
Miscarriage and Faith: Giving Thanks IN…not FOR
Miscarriage and Faith: Walking through the Valley
Miscarriage and Faith: Searching for Beauty
Pregnancy after Loss: Survivor's Guilt
Remembering Izzy: Pledged to God

FREE Stocking Stuffers Your Kids Will Love

For some reason, when thinking of stocking stuffers for my kids, all my brain was saying was "Uhhhh….?"

Then I started thinking about things my kids really like to do. Two of their favorites "special treats" are playing Angry Birds on my iPad and watching shows on Netflix. They only get to do these activities on special occasions so I thought…

"What about a coupon book?" 

 Coupons are easy and FREE and I know my boys will LOVE coupons for Angry Birds...

…and Netflix. I made 3 coupons for each activity with a check box to mark when the coupon has been redeemed. I'm sure these coupons will get good use over Christmas break!

I cut out some printable tags, wrote the coupon info, cut some wrapping paper to size, and stapled. BAM!

What do your kids love to do? Make some coupon books and stuff those stockings!

Your kids will love you! 

Our Top Ten Memories of our Christmas Vacation

Our Seven Best Memories of our Christmas Trip to Florida:

1.  My best friend, Candace came with us to Disney World! I'm glad we're still friends after she braved the 11 hour car trip from Virginia to Florida with us.

2. We went to Disney World for the first time! At 5 years old, Micah and Benji were the perfect age to be perfectly enchanted with everything Disney.  

Our family at Cinderella's Castle. I wore Silas in the wrap for the first half of the day and Candace wore him for the second half.

Even Silas got in on the Disney Fun! He slept the WHOLE DAY in the wrap! YEA!

We had a blast doing all-things-boy:

Meeting Buzz Lightyear, laughing it up at the Monsters INC show, getting major whiplash and laughing our heads off while the boys drove on the race car track, riding the spooky Pirates of the Caribbean ride, and taking the boys on their very first roller coaster: Thunder Mountain Railroad. 

Surprisingly, Micah (our often timid son) LOVED the "crazy train" (as he called TMR) but our crazy-Benji thought it was a little scary.

Meeting Buzz Lightyear! The boys LOVED riding the Buzz Lightyear ride as well!

3. A definite highlight was spending time with family, especially seeing M and B spend time with their cousins, Charlotte (5), Naomi (3) and Heidi (8 months) for the first time. 

Charlotte, Micah, Silas, Benji, Naomi, and Heidi

Christmas Eve: Our Family with Aaron's sister's family (Brittany, Jared, and girls)

Charlotte, Micah, Benji, Naomi

All four of the big kids loved playing together and "Char-lick" didn't mind that the boys couldn't pronounce her name. 

4. Although we spent the majority of time with Aaron's HUGE family (one family party boasted of 60ish Mengs), we also spent a few precious hours with my grandmother, Nonnie. 

She loved snuggling with her newest great-grandson. In fact, she did this instead of eating. 

Grandmother, Grand daughter, great-grandsons

Precious memories

 And I learned that my own great-grandmother, Elise May Long, had my shared interest and talent for writing and radio drama! Who knew?!

5. Another special memory was spending time with Angela, Aaron's older sister. She lives 5 minutes from Jacksonville Beach so the boys got to see the ocean for the first time! To them it was the greatest puddle ever (!) with an endless supply of splash-makers (shells) for throwing in the water. 

6. We spent Christmas Eve relaxing with just our family at the camp we were staying at. We had fun throwing rocks in the lake, looking at deer tracks, trekking through the woods, helping the boys climb through a rope maze, and napping. 

Silas turned 2 months old on Christmas Eve too

7.  Christmas morning was magical when the boys realized that "Santa came!" by witnessing that the cold hot chocolate and (rather dried out) dinner roll they left for him (hey, we didn't have cookies or milk!) had been drunk and eaten. Score one for Santa (and Mommy)! 

Our Top Three Not-so-awesome memories:

1. Getting a flat tire on our way home from Disney World. While we were stranded for 1.5 hours, Silas decided to have his first scream-fest. Thankfully, we got FREE help from the turn-pike serviceman. Thank God!

2. On the way to take Candace to the airport, Benji told us he had to pee. Of course, we JUST passed the rest stop. We asked him if he could hold it. 

"Nooooo! I can't!" he assured us. 

"Oh, yes! you can!" We assured him. 

Guess who was right? 

20 minutes later we hear: "I just peed" followed by a contented sigh from the back seat. 

Lesson learned. 

(Poor kid had to sit in his soaked pants for the next hour while we got to the airport and I frantically searched for size 5T pants in the airport mall. Thank you, Universal Studios Store for stocking $20 SpiderMan pants for my kid). 

And the next time he said "I have to pee!" from the back seat? You better believe we pulled over and let him do his business on the side of the road. 

3. We did a TON of driving. We put 1800 miles on our new car. Whew. 

Our Three boys: Benji, Silas, Micah

Overall, we had a great trip and Christmas in Florida but we are glad to be back home in Virginia. 

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year from the Meng's!

Frugal Festivities: Decorating for Christmas on a Budget

It's the first Saturday and December and if you aren't the "buy/put-up-the-tree-the-day-after-Thanksgiving" type, you are probably buying/putting up your tree today and thinking about how to make your home festive for the holidays!

Honestly though, if you weren't smart  lucky enough (I wasn't) to score major sales on Christmas decorations on on December 26th last year, decorating on a budget can be a daunting task. 

Here are some simple projects I've made this year (or in past years) that make my house feel like Christmas:

Homemade Sweater Stockings

I made these stockings a few years ago from felted wool sweaters that I bought from Goodwill. 

(felting = wash and dry on HOT)

I found a simple stocking pattern online used that as a template. Stockings are such a family tradition and even though I had a beautiful knitted stocking from growing up, I wanted new ones for my new family. 

You can personalize your homemade stockings in many ways, especially from a sweater--for mine (in case you couldn't tell, the hurts-your-eyes pink one above. I must have been acutely feeling the testosterone in my home the year I made this) I used the cowl collar of the sweater for the opening of the stocking. Pretty!

Even if you already have stockings, monogramming them can add a special personalized touch to your holiday decor. 

Countdown to Christmas Garland

I did a blog post about our 24 day Countdown to Christmas Activities here...

...but this fun activity also doubles as a garland for our mantle. 

(if you click on the picture you can see that the decorations on the Left are stacked holiday tins. These were left over from cookies and hot chocolate gifts that I received in years past. Totally free!)

So, you may be saying, hey...your stockings are on the mantle in your previous pictures. Well, last year they were, but this year I have them hanging from the top of our upright piano. The bright colors of the stockings contrast beautifully against the dark wood. 

 Placing your stockings in a unique location can add freshness to your holiday decorating and provide color and cheer to a perhaps neglected area of your home. 

Twiggy Christmas tree

I wanted something simple and striking to grace a small bookcase by my front door so I decided to fill a  vase with rice and poke some branches in (collected from my back yard). I added a few simple red balls and a photo ornament from when the boys were one and ta-da! Unique and fun! (Later I added the BAM letter ornaments that are on my blog header to this twiggy tree)

DIY Paper Stars

I found this tutorial for these paper stars via pintrest. Though they are a little hard to see in the picture due to the glare of the sun, they look absolutely beautiful and add a special touch to my dining room.

I used cardstock for these but I've had some friends make them out of wrapping paper too! Pretty!

They look great in a window or would be absolutely magical if hung from the ceiling in your child's room too! 

DIY Festive Phrases Painting

I can't take credit for this project because my sister-in-law Brittany (yes we have the same name. There were two Brittany Meng's in the same family for a few months before she got married) made me these little beauties last year for Christmas! How much fun is this? Simple and sweet but with a big decorating impact. She used small canvas cards (they aren't very thick) from a craft store. 

"Ho! Ho! HO! Would be a fun combination too!

I am really not much of a decorator. This is actually the first year that I have actually decorated my house (beyond simply a Christmas tree) for Christmas. I love it and it feels very festive! I hope that these ideas inspire you to add simple and inexpensive decorations to your own home for the holidays. 

DIY Gifts for Grown-Ups

Christmas is coming! 

How about some DIY gifts for the grown-ups in your life? (Can you tell I spend most of my days with kids?)

Buttercup Bag

Check out this awesome PDF pattern here

(The lady who designed this bag offers a FREE pattern on her blog for a small purse. 

I bought the larger pattern for an extremely low price. So worth it!)

Even a beginning sewer can complete this easy purse.

I made bags for all my sisters and sis-in-laws and best friends a few years ago for Christmas. 

What made this project super economical was the fact that I made all the bags from upcycled clothing and fabric that I got at Goodwill (the lining of this purse is new fabric). This pink purse is made from a lady's blazer. I also made bags from corduroy pants and curtains. 

Every purse is one of a kind!

If you are into fashion and going green, this is the project for you. 

Sewing Machine Pin Cushion

If you have a mom, grandma or hey, even a best friend that sews, this is a sweet, fast little project. 

Click here for how to sew this simple pin cushion that ties onto your sewing machine. No more rolling your pin cushion onto the floor! 

Monogramed Ornaments

Last year, I made monogramed ornaments for every member of my family and extended family. Wow! That was a big project--but fun too! With just a little craft felt, crochet thread, ribbon and hot glue, you can make a personalized gift for your family and friends to grace their Christmas tree year after year. 

Click here for how to make these ornaments

Christmas Cards or Note Cards from Kids Artwork

Do you have a ton of your kids' artwork that you don't know what to do with? Cut it up and make note cards out of it to give to your parents, grandparents and teachers!

Click here for how I made these and more beautiful examples of these cards

Favorite Sweatshirt Pillow

Ok, I know these ideas are low on the scale of male ideas. And aren't men the hardest to shop for? Here's a little idea of what to do with his favorite sweatshirt that is just not wearable anymore. Make a pillow out of it! (Be sure that he really is ok with you cutting up his shirt though...believe me.)

I made this soft pillow a friend's request and he loved the outcome! 

And I loved that it was so fast and easy to make.

Food!

When all else fails and you don't know know what to make for all those people on your list, make them food. Everyone loves food, especially cookies!

These Mint Double Chocolate Chip Cookies are DELICIOUS, easy, and super economical--the base is  cake mix!

Hope this gives you some DIY ideas for your family and friends!

Coming soon: DIY Christmas Decorating on a Budget

DIY Christmas Gift Ideas for Kids

Christmas is coming! 

Are you planning on making gifts this year for the kids in your life? I'd love to share some ideas from my past projects with you. Most have links to blog posts or tutorials--feel free to use them for your gift making this year. 

Play Food

All kids love play food! This would be a great gift for boys or girls age 2 on up! 

Here's how I made this little personal pan pizza

Everyone loves sandwiches! Grilled cheese....

...or peanut butter and jelly!

Click here for how to make these yummy play sandwiches

Felt Mr. Potato Head

Mr. Potato Head--out of felt! 

This toy is so inexpensive and can easily be customized for a little boy or girl (Mrs. Potato Head, anyone?)

Felt Puppets

Do you have a budding performer in your family? How felt puppets to spark their imagination? 

We made a lion and a chicken at our house! 

Click here for the tutorial

Treasure Bags

Does your little guy or girl need a special bag to stash their stuff? Make a simple bag (with or without a zipper) to for your little one to keep his or her treasures!

Super Hero Mask and Cape

     

My boys love to play superheroes! 

Mask:

1. Cut 2 simple mask shapes from felt

2. Stich around the outside and eye holes

3. Stich elastic to fit your child's head

Cape:

1. Cut out the back of a large men's t-shirt in your super-hero's favorite color

2. Cut out a simple letter from felt or knit and zig-zag to the back

3. Hem sides and top with zig-zag

4. Add a hook and loop closure

SUPERHEROES!

Dinosaur Tails

Make a dinosaur or dragon tail for your little monsters! 

Click here for the awesome tutorial I followed to make these awesome tails for my boys. 

Character Pillows

Character pillows are a FAST and EASY project....

....even for the beginning sewer. 

Score one of those 40% off coupons from Joann's and this project will be very inexpensive too! 

Softy Owl

Make a sweet softy owl for your little one. Draw a simple shape on paper first and then use your pattern to cut out. Use felt for the eyes and beak. 

Click here to see a picture of the adorable fluffy tail on this simple toy!

Homemade Bibs

Upcycle your old receiving blankets into bibs for your little or big kid. 

Click here for the tutorial! 

(UPDATE: Two pieces of flannel work great too. Reversible bib, anyone?

Christmas Dresses

Every little girl needs a Christmas dress! A new dress doesn't need to break the bank. All of these outfits were made of upcycled clothing

Click here for how to make these adorable matching Christmas dresses

Click here for how to make a sweet little two-fer dress with ruffle rompers

Monogramed Blankets

Even a simple blanket can be personalized for that special little one in your life.

Add a monogram for a special touch to your Christmas gifts.

Topsy Turvy Doll 

I wish I had a blog post about this doll but sadly, I do not! I made this a few years ago for my little niece and I adore how it turned out. It took a little time but the end result was totally worth it! 

Check out this FREE pattern here

Stay tuned! DIY Christmas Gift Ideas for Grown-ups is coming up later this week!