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There have been a lot of changes this semester but one thing I have really enjoyed is having a little time in the morning to myself after I take the boys to school. Every day I drop the boys off and come home for a few hours to walk the dog, eat breakfast, drink coffee, watch a little Food Network, and do a little housework before heading to school for the day.

This week, however, has robbed me of my sweet morning routine. 

I have had student conferences Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday this week. Each conference is 15 minutes long--not bad, right? Well, if you multiply that by 43+ students (I had two conferences with some students)....let's just say I've been living at school this week. 

Yesterday I had 25 conferences. My stomach cramps up a little bit just remembering. While I love meeting with each student (most of them, anyway...) one on one, I really do not like the all-day-marathon of mental energy expended while helping student after student generate ideas, thesis sentences, organizational patterns, and MLA citations. It is exhausting. 

Plus I missed my date with my french vanilla coffee and Food Network.

Well, today is Thursday. Blessed Thursday!

I dropped the boys off at school and headed home for some me-time. Goldie and I took a beautiful walk on this crisp fall day, and I enjoyed a yummy breakfast and coffee, and yes, I am currently watching Food Network as I write this. 

And I have been looking forward to today for another reason: I am going shopping for the boys' birthday party this morning! I am so excited. 

Party hats, balloons, plates, party bags, here I come! 

How are my babies turning 3? Amazing! 

My dog hates me

It has been raining all week. Rain means no walk for Goldie. She has taken out her frustration by being very bad while I am at work. Very bad meaning eating Aaron's leather Bible  cover and eating a whole plate of homemade cinnamon rolls on Wednesday, knocking over the very full kitchen trash and strewing it all over my freshly vacuumed living room floor on Thursday, and last night (Thurs) she did this:

She ATE Aaron's new golf glove  

I think she is trying to tell us something....

Out of the minds of babes

As we were walking through a parking lot today, Benji spotted an orange traffic cone, exclaimed "CARROT!" and tried to take a bite of it!

Kids T-Shirt Refashion

Isn't it sad when your kids' favorite clothes start getting too small? The boys are at that stage right now and one of their favorite shirts is getting too short and tight. Plus, since the shirt is white, it was getting pretty dingy. Rather than retire their "Pirate Kid" shirts, however, I decided to refashion--well, really, upgrade--them.

The t-shirts before. The new ones were from a pack of 5 undershirts from Walmart

I cut out a background from scraps from one of Aaron's t-shirts I used for a previous refashion

A pattern for the background make from a large envelope (recycled junkmail...)

Background and picture cut out

I zig-zaged the picture to the background

Then zig-zaged the background to the t-shirt. Ta-da! "New" shirts!
Micah said, "I like it!"

Sandbox Saturday

I felt like I got to spend some real quality time with the boys this morning. Check out what we did--Sandbox fun!
Sandbox = free (hand-me-down from a family at our church)
Sand toys = $2 at Target (gotta love a great deal!)
Two HUNDRED pounds of sand--yes, 200 pounds. As in 4 fifty pound bags. That's a lot of sand.

The boys had a blast! And so did I. :)

Micah Man

Benji Boy

Want some sand, Mommy?

What is better than two boys in a sandbox?

I told him to smile....I guess the camera wasn't fast enough

I also told B to smile...I get dazed an confused...this is SO a "Meng" look....

The TINY two-fer dress

Here is my version of a TINY two-fer dress. I made it out of a 0-3 month onesie and a t-shirt. I absolutely LOVE how this turned out. It is so sweet and so tiny! My favorite part is the bloomers--ruffle butt! AWWW! I hope Chelsea and my new little niece love them!

Before: Cute little orange and white striped onesie

Before: T-shirt that ended up in our luggage when we came home from camp (weird, but free material for me!!!)

AFTER! Sweet little two-fer dress with bloomers!

The bloomers have elastic to hold them up and....

RUFFLES!! AHH! So, so cute! 

The "Little" Two-fer dress

My sister Chelsea is expecting her first baby in October--a GIRL! The first one in the family (there are 5 grandsons right now). I wanted to make her some clothes so here are my attempts at "refashioning" for a baby. I love how this outfit turned out!

The top "before"--one of the boys' onesies (I used the bottom to make a pair of underwear for the boys)

The bottom "before"--a skirt that wasn't quite my style

AFTER! Isn't it cute? It will probably fit 9-12 months

I "feminized" the sleeves a bit by shortening them and adding a  cuff made out of the skirt material

"Spit it OUT!"

This is kind of a sad post...but funny too.

Benji threw-up last night. I have no idea why because he was fine this morning other than sleeping a little longer than normal. We have Wednesday night suppers at church and I think something just didn't agree with his little tummy. :(

Benji HATES to be messy. Hates hates hates! If his hands get messy at dinner he has to have the cleaned before he can continue eating. So, getting sick last night in his bed was probably his worst nightmare because he was very messy all over his head, chest, and blankie. There was much wailing.

We were all up from 11:30 to 1:00am last night. YAWN! Thankfully Benji seemed to get all the sickness out of his system and by the time we laid him down again he was chattering away about what happened.

Here is his two-year old version about throwing up: "It was hot. It was messy. Spit it OUT!"

Sounds about right, Benj! I am glad you are feeling better today, sweet boy!

Baby Clothes

A friend of mine is adopting a new baby soon--her birth mother is still pregnant and the baby could arrive any day; in fact, the baby could be premature. She asked me if I had any preemie clothes that I would be willing to give her. I said YES! Of course!

And my heart sunk a little. Not because I'm not thrilled for her or that I don't want to give my clothes away. It is just hard to part with such itty-bitty sweet baby outfits that my itty-bitty-barely-four-pound twins wore when they came home from the hospital. I actually have been hoarding their preemie clothes in a big plastic bag in my basement, keeping them all to myself for....Um...I don't know.

There are no babies in my immediate future and God willing, we will not have another preemie.

So I said, YES! Of Course!

I can't hang on the them forever. They are just SITTING in my basement. That is silly. And a little selfish. Especially when this new little baby could use them.

So I dug them out of the basement tonight and sorted through them. The look brand new--after all, babies grow so fast and don't really "do" anything to wear the clothes out. And they were so tiny and cute.

What happened? how did my babies get so big? It is amazing.

Aaron watched me sort though the clothes and asked me if it was hard to let them go. I said yes--with a lump in my throat. The clothes are attached to so many memories. But like I said, I don't need them anymore and the right thing to do is let them go, especially if someone else can use them.

I did keep a few outfits for myself--I just had to.

My babies are not babies anymore. It is sad. But it is happy too. They are healthy and growing, loving and wonderful. They are able to talk to me, hug me, kiss me, and say "I love you Mommy!" They had a blast when we went putt-putting and go-cart riding for the first time on Saturday. Only little boys can do things like that. So growing up is good.

But just like the clothes, it is hard to let the baby stage go.

(Compare this to the picture on my heading...)

How I'm doing

CAUTION: LONG post coming up...
So, after my "rant" the other day I had quite a bit of response--either by facebook, phone, or face-to-face with people. It seem like most moms, especially with little children, can relate.

In an effort to be honest, I thought I would blog about how I'm doing this week--for real. :)

We all started school this week! On Monday the boys were so excited about everything! Time to line up? OK! YEA!!! Time to each lunch? ALL RIGHT! YEA!! Outside? YEA YEA YEA! The director said she had never seen kids so excited about everything. She loved it!

On Tuesday the boys were ready to go to school again and said "Hi Miss Claude-i-a!" as soon as they went in their room. So cute. Micah was a little sad when I left. So was I.

That night I think it finally hit me that this preschool thing is for real. Like an all-day-big-deal. Like my life as a stay at home mom is over--maybe for good. And then the tears came--a lot. Most moms cry on the first day that their kids start school. I guess it didn't hit me till the end of day two. (Though I did cry a few weeks ago...)

Wednesday Micah was really sad and did not want me to leave. And after my breakdown the night  before...well let's just say I was equally sad when I left my little boy, walked out of the room and heard him calling, "Mommy! Mommy!" Wow, that is hard to even write. :(

I have been able to call and talk to their teachers every afternoon to see how they are doing. Miss Candace and Miss Claudia have assured me that Micah stops crying 1-2 minutes after I leave and quickly gets excited about the next event of the day. Both boys LOVE playing outside, playing with cars, eating breakfast and lunch. Both have taken good naps in the afternoon and have gone on the potty every day! I am very proud.

Benji is doing fine emotionally. He barely even notices when I leave--I have to steal a kiss from that active little guy! He is so excited about "friends!" and loves his teachers. He is such a sweetie--though he keeps them on their toes because he is so active.

I hope and pray that Micah will feel assured and more and more comfortable about going to school every day. I know it is a big change for him. It is a big change for me.

I came home for a bit on Monday and when I walked into the empty house, I realized that this is the very first time I had been at home and the boys had not been there--ever. Like since they have been born. It was a very strange feeling--a little sad and a little nice and a LOT quiet. :)

I have been able to get SO much done during the day when I am at home. Housework is a snap! I have been able to get chores done in an hour or less when it would have taken me all morning. I have also been able to walk Goldie every day. It has been nice to get outside, get exercise, and spend some time with my furry baby. She is such a better dog when she walks every day--like she doesn't run away every time I let her out to do her business.

I remarked to someone earlier this week that I felt amazing! I hadn't yelled at anyone, been frustrated, irritated or had to resist smacking anyone's bottom all morning. Amazing! Like I said in my previous post, being a mom is emotionally exhausting at times. I was struggling with my anger every day, trying not to get worked up about things like messes, fighting over toys, delayed obedience, or when my child decides to head-butt me in the chest. So, for that reason, it is NICE to have the boys in preschool--it helps me to appreciate them more when I am with them and not focus so much on the irritations of motherhood or how tired I am.

But I miss the hugs. I miss the kisses. I miss the excited "Hey Mommy!" from my little Micah and Benji. I miss the excitement of every new thing they discover. I miss knowing exactly what they do every day--every potty success, what they eat, how much they slept, what they played with. It is hard for me to let go.

During my breakdown on Tuesday night, Aaron reminded me that our boys are growing up and as they grow, I have to let them go. I bawled "I'm not ready to let them go yet!" It seems too soon. But I know that having them in the ELC is the  best decision for our family this semester as I try to finish up grad school. It is a hard decision and even this morning as I left Micah crying when I said goodbye, I questioned (again) if it was the "right" decision. I said a prayer for him and myself. I know I just have to trust the Lord that he will take care of me and my children while we are away from each other.

After all, He knows what is like to be a parent--and all the struggles that come along with that.